Posted 14 years ago
Lmao! "......Um.... we killed your family" XD!
Jokes!
Posted 14 years ago
Horn on an old AZN chick?
Posted 14 years ago
Yo dwg I heard you like shooting and smoking things so I gave you 2 bullets, a gun, cigarette, and a a respectable gay man so you can smoke a a respectable gay man while you smokin a a respectable gay man LMAO
Posted 13 years ago
JoeyEx wrote:(kind of) Perv joke, no offense to anybody: >_<
2 Black guys enter (a) bar...Seconds later Bar dies
That was terrible!
Posted 13 years ago
The owners of Corona, Heinken and Tuborg walk into a bar.
The owner of Corona orders a beer: "I want Corona, the best beer in the world!".
The owner of Heinken orders a beer: "I want Heinken, the best-est beer in the world!".
The owner of Tuborg orders: "I want Coca Cola."
The bartender asks why the Tuborg owner wants Coca Cola.
The owner's reply: "I see they ain't getting real beer, so i'm not gonna get one either."
The owner of Corona orders a beer: "I want Corona, the best beer in the world!".
The owner of Heinken orders a beer: "I want Heinken, the best-est beer in the world!".
The owner of Tuborg orders: "I want Coca Cola."
The bartender asks why the Tuborg owner wants Coca Cola.
The owner's reply: "I see they ain't getting real beer, so i'm not gonna get one either."
Posted 13 years ago
This is a little long, so bear with me.
A young man walks into a bar and sees an old man crying. The young man asks, 'Why are you crying sir?' The old man replies, sobbing, 'I just married a beautiful twenty year old model. She takes care of me, cleans the house, cooks delishious food every day, and after dinner, we make passionate love for hours.' The young man was astonished. 'That sounds amazing! Why would you have anything to cry about?' And the old man said, bursting into hysteria again, 'I forget where I live!'
A young man walks into a bar and sees an old man crying. The young man asks, 'Why are you crying sir?' The old man replies, sobbing, 'I just married a beautiful twenty year old model. She takes care of me, cleans the house, cooks delishious food every day, and after dinner, we make passionate love for hours.' The young man was astonished. 'That sounds amazing! Why would you have anything to cry about?' And the old man said, bursting into hysteria again, 'I forget where I live!'
Posted 13 years ago
uhh what are teeth you can buy for a dollar??
buck-teeth! get it!
-- Mon Aug 01, 2011 10:44 pm --
if u guys want a real joke...
look in the mirror
buck-teeth! get it!
-- Mon Aug 01, 2011 10:44 pm --
if u guys want a real joke...
look in the mirror
Posted 11 years ago
GAY JOKES
There once was a bear and a rabbit and they hated each other. The bear and rabbit then stumbled upon a magical talking tree. The tree said: "I will grant you 3 wishes a piece if you will stop fighting!"
So the bear went first. "I wish all the bears in the forest are females." And all the bears in the forest turned into females.
The rabbit said: "I wish I had a helmet." Rabbit gets the helmet and the bear looks at him funny.
The bear wishes: "I wish all the bears in the country are females." The wish was granted.
The rabbit says, "I wish I have a motorcycle." By this point the bear thinks the rabbit is the stupidest thing he's ever seen. The rabbit could wish for money and have all the motorcycles in the world.
The bear says: "I wish all the bears in the world are female." The wish is granted.
When it's the rabbit's turn to wish, he puts on his helmet, gets on his motorcycle, and says: "I wish that bear is gay."
A bloke walks into a bar and orders 10 double whiskys and downs them in one.
Barman: "What's up?"
Bloke: "My youngest son just told me Don Von Free Credits is awesome!".
Next day he goes in and orders 15 double whiskys.
Barman: "What's up now?"
Bloke: "Just found out my oldest son is gay!"
Next day he goes in and orders 20 double whiskys.
Barman: "Fuck me! Does no one in your family like pussies?"
Bloke: "Yes - my wife!"
Jokes Top New Game Voting Suggest
brown bear
There once was a bear and a rabbit and they hated each other. The bear and rabbit then stumbled upon a magical talking tree. The tree said: "I will grant you 3 wishes a piece if you will stop fighting!"
So the bear went first. "I wish all the bears in the forest are females." And all the bears in the forest turned into females.
The rabbit said: "I wish I had a helmet." Rabbit gets the helmet and the bear looks at him funny.
The bear wishes: "I wish all the bears in the country are females." The wish was granted.
The rabbit says, "I wish I have a motorcycle." By this point the bear thinks the rabbit is the stupidest thing he's ever seen. The rabbit could wish for money and have all the motorcycles in the world.
The bear says: "I wish all the bears in the world are female." The wish is granted.
When it's the rabbit's turn to wish, he puts on his helmet, gets on his motorcycle, and says: "I wish that bear is gay."
7 Comments · Single View
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A bloke walks into a bar and orders 10 double whiskys and downs them in one.
Barman: "What's up?"
Bloke: "My youngest son just told me Don Von Free Credits is awesome!".
Next day he goes in and orders 15 double whiskys.
Barman: "What's up now?"
Bloke: "Just found out my oldest son is gay!"
Next day he goes in and orders 20 double whiskys.
Barman: "Fuck me! Does no one in your family like pussies?"
Bloke: "Yes - my wife!"
2 Comments · Single View
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
They already have boyfriends
...................................................................................
What happened when the gay guy put a nicotine patch on his dick?
He went down to two butts a day.
..................................................................................
3 guys go camping in their new tent.
After a night's sleep, the guy sleeping on the left of the tent wakes up in a cold sweat and tells the others "I had the most horrible nightmare that somebody was trying to pull my dick off!"
The guy sleeping on the right says "Weird! I had the exact same dream!"
The guy sleeping in the middle says "I had a dream that I was skiing ..."
.................................................................................................
A cowboy from Montana and a cowboy from California are on a sheep drive. They have been out for weeks and have been pulling sheep out of the mud and working really hard. Eventually they come across a sheep with her head stuck in the fence.
They are both very lonely, so the cowboy from Montana says "I'm first!" and he drops his pants and mounts the sheep. When he is finished, he steps back, looks at the California cowboy, and says "You're next".
The California cowboy drops his pants and sticks his head in the fence.
................................................................................................
What did one gay sperm say to the other?
How do we get out of this shit?
...............................................................................................
A Greek and Italian were arguing over who had the superior culture.
The Greek says, "We have the Parthenon."
Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum."
The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics"
The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the Roman Empire."
And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says, "We invented sex!"
The Italian replies, "That is true, but it was the Italians who introduced it to women."
...........................................................................................................
How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
Both of them.
...................................................................................................
There once was a bear and a rabbit and they hated each other. The bear and rabbit then stumbled upon a magical talking tree. The tree said: "I will grant you 3 wishes a piece if you will stop fighting!"
So the bear went first. "I wish all the bears in the forest are females." And all the bears in the forest turned into females.
The rabbit said: "I wish I had a helmet." Rabbit gets the helmet and the bear looks at him funny.
The bear wishes: "I wish all the bears in the country are females." The wish was granted.
The rabbit says, "I wish I have a motorcycle." By this point the bear thinks the rabbit is the stupidest thing he's ever seen. The rabbit could wish for money and have all the motorcycles in the world.
The bear says: "I wish all the bears in the world are female." The wish is granted.
When it's the rabbit's turn to wish, he puts on his helmet, gets on his motorcycle, and says: "I wish that bear is gay."
A bloke walks into a bar and orders 10 double whiskys and downs them in one.
Barman: "What's up?"
Bloke: "My youngest son just told me Don Von Free Credits is awesome!".
Next day he goes in and orders 15 double whiskys.
Barman: "What's up now?"
Bloke: "Just found out my oldest son is gay!"
Next day he goes in and orders 20 double whiskys.
Barman: "Fuck me! Does no one in your family like pussies?"
Bloke: "Yes - my wife!"
Jokes Top New Game Voting Suggest
brown bear
There once was a bear and a rabbit and they hated each other. The bear and rabbit then stumbled upon a magical talking tree. The tree said: "I will grant you 3 wishes a piece if you will stop fighting!"
So the bear went first. "I wish all the bears in the forest are females." And all the bears in the forest turned into females.
The rabbit said: "I wish I had a helmet." Rabbit gets the helmet and the bear looks at him funny.
The bear wishes: "I wish all the bears in the country are females." The wish was granted.
The rabbit says, "I wish I have a motorcycle." By this point the bear thinks the rabbit is the stupidest thing he's ever seen. The rabbit could wish for money and have all the motorcycles in the world.
The bear says: "I wish all the bears in the world are female." The wish is granted.
When it's the rabbit's turn to wish, he puts on his helmet, gets on his motorcycle, and says: "I wish that bear is gay."
7 Comments · Single View
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A bloke walks into a bar and orders 10 double whiskys and downs them in one.
Barman: "What's up?"
Bloke: "My youngest son just told me Don Von Free Credits is awesome!".
Next day he goes in and orders 15 double whiskys.
Barman: "What's up now?"
Bloke: "Just found out my oldest son is gay!"
Next day he goes in and orders 20 double whiskys.
Barman: "Fuck me! Does no one in your family like pussies?"
Bloke: "Yes - my wife!"
2 Comments · Single View
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
They already have boyfriends
...................................................................................
What happened when the gay guy put a nicotine patch on his dick?
He went down to two butts a day.
..................................................................................
3 guys go camping in their new tent.
After a night's sleep, the guy sleeping on the left of the tent wakes up in a cold sweat and tells the others "I had the most horrible nightmare that somebody was trying to pull my dick off!"
The guy sleeping on the right says "Weird! I had the exact same dream!"
The guy sleeping in the middle says "I had a dream that I was skiing ..."
.................................................................................................
A cowboy from Montana and a cowboy from California are on a sheep drive. They have been out for weeks and have been pulling sheep out of the mud and working really hard. Eventually they come across a sheep with her head stuck in the fence.
They are both very lonely, so the cowboy from Montana says "I'm first!" and he drops his pants and mounts the sheep. When he is finished, he steps back, looks at the California cowboy, and says "You're next".
The California cowboy drops his pants and sticks his head in the fence.
................................................................................................
What did one gay sperm say to the other?
How do we get out of this shit?
...............................................................................................
A Greek and Italian were arguing over who had the superior culture.
The Greek says, "We have the Parthenon."
Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum."
The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics"
The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the Roman Empire."
And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says, "We invented sex!"
The Italian replies, "That is true, but it was the Italians who introduced it to women."
...........................................................................................................
How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
Both of them.
...................................................................................................