Posted 2 years ago
·
Author
Posted 2 years ago
I feel like it depends on opinions and standards. Being in a relationship with another guy doesn't mean you have to be sexually attracted to them. Could just be romantically or emotionally, or intellectually even. On the flip side, you could find yourself someone who's totally buff and masculine, and yet is completely submissive and gives up control. So it's really a mind bender once you start thinking about it. I'd say just be comfortable with asking around for others advice, and don't be afraid to sorta see what it's like either yourself or in other peoples shoes.
Posted 2 years ago
I guess my opinion is invalid hehehe
Last edited by Bad Jab on Sat Dec 31, 2022 3:05 am, edited 1 time in total.
Posted 2 years ago
I'm a straight male irl. I have lived [let's say it's an old friend but most of the contact between us was via internet, music fans communities and such] with a gay person for a month now and then and it's quite sad how sometimes it's impossible for sexuality not to get in the way of a cool friendship. Well, you think you have a "friend" but you never know and you realize there's always "hints" and "suggestions" even though your body language is clear and your straight preference is evident - the person still tries. Sad and quite annoying. Sad bi person who can't accept your preference and gets annoyed with you for not fulfilling their "agenda".
I have a feeling gay guys are more pushing and it's more about sex than with girls and gay girl vs straight girl friendship. Is that true from your experiences ?
I mean: is it more likely for a friendship between straight girl and a gay girl to last ? Than it is / would be with men/boys/guys ?
I have a feeling gay guys are more pushing and it's more about sex than with girls and gay girl vs straight girl friendship. Is that true from your experiences ?
I mean: is it more likely for a friendship between straight girl and a gay girl to last ? Than it is / would be with men/boys/guys ?
Posted 2 years ago
I am a straight female in real life....i have never been involved with a a gay...but got lots of gay friends....both male female.... I never thought of being sexually involved with them or maybe just did not have the chance to meet someone that really interest me.....but sometimes i wonder....what if i was born a male....maybe it would be nice to know how male feels....how they think....how do they fall in love and get interested.....how man reach to certain situation...I think that would be interesting to know.
Posted 1 year ago
Ok, so .. I find this interesting, because to answer this question, I have to really dig deep into things I haven't completely come to understand about myself yet.
It's not a topic I feel comfortable thinking about. But, I need to do some self examination, so, I'm going to write my thoughts down here. I'm probably going to delete this before it gets posted... But here goes anyway.
I'm someone who underwent a lot of sexual abuse as a child. From approx the age of three up until I was 21 in fact. It came from both makes and females.
I got "past" some of it in a way, by developing a need to dominate females, and a general distrust of men.
Therefore, I've been strictly Hetero in actions most of my life.
Now this is where it gets interesting. I remember getting a job at a tow company. The owner's son, Andrew.... DAMNNNN was he SEXYYY. Andrew was "safe" because he was a hetero, married man. The day I met him, I spent hours beating my meat thinking about his rippling muscles under his skin that was shimmering with sweat... Imagining what it would be like to be his "toy".
Then there's the Dentist I spent 7 years of my life around. At first, it started with getting lunch. Then going on road trips. Then it progressed to sharing a room because one of our rooms was over booked.
Then, we discussed it, and I said I'd be ok with sharing a bed. (I had no sexual thoughts towards him at the time.)
That night as we got ready to go to bed we watched a porno. Neither of us fapped. But, I should note, that he was NOT someone who wore clothes to bed. Something about seeing his big.. beautiful cock just laying there while we watched porn made me want to do more. But I didn't. Over time, as we kept going on trips, sharing beds, we got more comfortable with each other.
I remember one night specifically. The trip was short notice, and I hadn't packed pajamas, so like him, I was nude. That night, I had a nightmare. Woke up to him pulling me into little spoon position. It was so comforting, and reassuring. Went back to sleep. And in the morning, when I woke up, he had morning wood that was resting someplace very sensitive.
Getting in that position turned into a VERY common thing on our trips. But we never actually did anything. I always wished we had though.
Now, in more recent times... I've noticed I still have a thing for the sexy, dominant masculine men, but also... Fem boys!
I met someone a few months ago, a very buff guy, who has all of the masculinity I could ask for... But who is a switch. And bi. And switches to femboy. Vincent is my kryptonite. I don't really care what form he's in at any given moment.... He's sexy. So, when he started harmlessly flirting, it made my heart flutter. Then his flirting got more... Intense... And I responded by flirting back. It's now a whole thing, and very much a part of why I'm on IMVU, and why I have the project in mind that I'm working on. Trying to basically make a video representation of my life, and the experiences I've been thru. Come to an understanding of myself.
I've always considered myself heterosexual. But, over the last few years, I've started to realize that I'm more of a pansexual than hetero. For me, that journey of self discovery started with a question exactly like the one you asked in this post.
I will say though, that I have also started to realize that I have some... Shall I say... Gender identity issues. I "feel" like I am two sexual beings in one, that I switch between male, and female. And that complicates things even more. As a man, Ive realized I love women, and some men. As a woman, I've realized that I love both entirely... But more importantly, I have come to the understanding that I really don't care about the gender of the partner like I used to. At this point, I care more about how they act. How they make me feel. There are, also, certain gender specific things a person must measure up to. With men specifically, they have to be someone who leaves me feeling SAFE. If a man intimidates me, even ONCE, nothing doing. If he hurts me, even once, nothing doing. He's got to be someone I can respect as well.
So, I guess what I'm saying is, that in reality, I was probably never straight in the first place. And looking back on how I've felt, as far as my own body, and my own sexuality... I've been... Maybe the word is Bi-gender... My entire life as well... I just didn't acknowledge that ... Didn't know how to process it, couldn't understand it, or accept it.
I'm still struggling with it, and I still refuse to call myself anything but a hetero MALE. Even IF I wanted to present otherwise, I don't know how, and I don't want the drama or the judgement, or the awkward interactions, or to have everyone label me as gay, or queer, or even LGBTQ+.
I don't know how I would actually interact with the world in general if I were to "come out of the closet." As is, just writing this down has me shaking from embarrassment.
One interesting fact though. I've felt "different" from everyone else since I was 5. Felt like I didn't deserve to live because of my differences, so my first attempt at not living, I was 6. I've constantly struggled with body dismorphia(spell check?) And depression, and issues with interpersonal relationships, and bullying.
So many people have asked me questions like "why do you act so gay?" Or "dude wtf is the matter with you?" I have never found a group of people who I could actually be MYSELF around. Keeping myself buried away, so deep that even I haven't known who I really am has been a very painful experience. But even now, I don't know if I have what it takes to do anything differently.
A big part of me wishes I didn't exist, because then I wouldn't have to deal with any of this.
I know this isn't a therapy group, so I'm sorry for posting so much, that goes so deep.
And I wish all of you the best of luck, and happiness! Hopefully, you all have more peace surrounding your preferences, and sexuality than I do mine.
Right now, having written all of this, I feel like curling up in a ball, and crying myself to sleep. Hiding my head under a pillow and never coming out again. ALL of this hurts.
But who knows... Maybe it'll help someone?
P.S. Dom, if I went into too much detail with this, I'm sorry.. or if it's too long... Or inappropriate in some other way. If so, let me know, and I'll correct whatever issues you point out! Thanks
It's not a topic I feel comfortable thinking about. But, I need to do some self examination, so, I'm going to write my thoughts down here. I'm probably going to delete this before it gets posted... But here goes anyway.
I'm someone who underwent a lot of sexual abuse as a child. From approx the age of three up until I was 21 in fact. It came from both makes and females.
I got "past" some of it in a way, by developing a need to dominate females, and a general distrust of men.
Therefore, I've been strictly Hetero in actions most of my life.
Now this is where it gets interesting. I remember getting a job at a tow company. The owner's son, Andrew.... DAMNNNN was he SEXYYY. Andrew was "safe" because he was a hetero, married man. The day I met him, I spent hours beating my meat thinking about his rippling muscles under his skin that was shimmering with sweat... Imagining what it would be like to be his "toy".
Then there's the Dentist I spent 7 years of my life around. At first, it started with getting lunch. Then going on road trips. Then it progressed to sharing a room because one of our rooms was over booked.
Then, we discussed it, and I said I'd be ok with sharing a bed. (I had no sexual thoughts towards him at the time.)
That night as we got ready to go to bed we watched a porno. Neither of us fapped. But, I should note, that he was NOT someone who wore clothes to bed. Something about seeing his big.. beautiful cock just laying there while we watched porn made me want to do more. But I didn't. Over time, as we kept going on trips, sharing beds, we got more comfortable with each other.
I remember one night specifically. The trip was short notice, and I hadn't packed pajamas, so like him, I was nude. That night, I had a nightmare. Woke up to him pulling me into little spoon position. It was so comforting, and reassuring. Went back to sleep. And in the morning, when I woke up, he had morning wood that was resting someplace very sensitive.
Getting in that position turned into a VERY common thing on our trips. But we never actually did anything. I always wished we had though.
Now, in more recent times... I've noticed I still have a thing for the sexy, dominant masculine men, but also... Fem boys!
I met someone a few months ago, a very buff guy, who has all of the masculinity I could ask for... But who is a switch. And bi. And switches to femboy. Vincent is my kryptonite. I don't really care what form he's in at any given moment.... He's sexy. So, when he started harmlessly flirting, it made my heart flutter. Then his flirting got more... Intense... And I responded by flirting back. It's now a whole thing, and very much a part of why I'm on IMVU, and why I have the project in mind that I'm working on. Trying to basically make a video representation of my life, and the experiences I've been thru. Come to an understanding of myself.
I've always considered myself heterosexual. But, over the last few years, I've started to realize that I'm more of a pansexual than hetero. For me, that journey of self discovery started with a question exactly like the one you asked in this post.
I will say though, that I have also started to realize that I have some... Shall I say... Gender identity issues. I "feel" like I am two sexual beings in one, that I switch between male, and female. And that complicates things even more. As a man, Ive realized I love women, and some men. As a woman, I've realized that I love both entirely... But more importantly, I have come to the understanding that I really don't care about the gender of the partner like I used to. At this point, I care more about how they act. How they make me feel. There are, also, certain gender specific things a person must measure up to. With men specifically, they have to be someone who leaves me feeling SAFE. If a man intimidates me, even ONCE, nothing doing. If he hurts me, even once, nothing doing. He's got to be someone I can respect as well.
So, I guess what I'm saying is, that in reality, I was probably never straight in the first place. And looking back on how I've felt, as far as my own body, and my own sexuality... I've been... Maybe the word is Bi-gender... My entire life as well... I just didn't acknowledge that ... Didn't know how to process it, couldn't understand it, or accept it.
I'm still struggling with it, and I still refuse to call myself anything but a hetero MALE. Even IF I wanted to present otherwise, I don't know how, and I don't want the drama or the judgement, or the awkward interactions, or to have everyone label me as gay, or queer, or even LGBTQ+.
I don't know how I would actually interact with the world in general if I were to "come out of the closet." As is, just writing this down has me shaking from embarrassment.
One interesting fact though. I've felt "different" from everyone else since I was 5. Felt like I didn't deserve to live because of my differences, so my first attempt at not living, I was 6. I've constantly struggled with body dismorphia(spell check?) And depression, and issues with interpersonal relationships, and bullying.
So many people have asked me questions like "why do you act so gay?" Or "dude wtf is the matter with you?" I have never found a group of people who I could actually be MYSELF around. Keeping myself buried away, so deep that even I haven't known who I really am has been a very painful experience. But even now, I don't know if I have what it takes to do anything differently.
A big part of me wishes I didn't exist, because then I wouldn't have to deal with any of this.
I know this isn't a therapy group, so I'm sorry for posting so much, that goes so deep.
And I wish all of you the best of luck, and happiness! Hopefully, you all have more peace surrounding your preferences, and sexuality than I do mine.
Right now, having written all of this, I feel like curling up in a ball, and crying myself to sleep. Hiding my head under a pillow and never coming out again. ALL of this hurts.
But who knows... Maybe it'll help someone?
P.S. Dom, if I went into too much detail with this, I'm sorry.. or if it's too long... Or inappropriate in some other way. If so, let me know, and I'll correct whatever issues you point out! Thanks
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